I had a moment with my children this weekend. It was not my best moment as a mother, but I hope it turned into a learning moment for all involved.
A little background is necessary. Since we live in home that was a blend of two fully functioning homes, we have many duplicates and triplicates of things. Because of work and interest, one thing we have in abundance is electronic devices. Which brings us to the offending moment.
My two daughters and I were the only ones home, and I was upstairs when a fight ensued downstairs. Upon my motherly investigation I found that the fight was over both wanting to be on one particular computer that was deemed the easiest to log into.
Maybe it was because of a long work week. Maybe it was because of some of the difficult things I have seen my clients suffer, and maybe it wasbecause I have not been able to nap this weekend, but I lost it. “Are you really telling me that in a home where we have multiple computers, and you two are fluent in multiple languages, you arefighting over one device?! You guys know what Ido each day! Little girls across the world aren’t even allowed to learn to read! You could log in to any computer in this house in English or Chinese!”
Needless to say, there were tears and apologies from children and mother alike. We had a good conversation about taking things for granted, and also getting needlessly frustrated.
But what of my point? The other day I was in a conversation with a person asking me why it is in any way fair to hold the hand of a refugee, when so many people right here at home do not get their hands held in so many ways.
For me, I choose to see how the hands of myselfand my children get held. I think of an 8th gradeteacher who read a cry for help in a paper I wrote, and not only saw my emotion but planted a seed in my mind that perhaps I had a talent in writing. I think of a kindergarten teacher who held the hand of my eldest and said she had a gift of languages. I think of a second grade teacher who helped my youngest feel important because of her experiences. My daughters both started theireducation before age five. My daughters had books in their little hands all their lives. So yes, their hands have been held. A whole community of people hold their hands daily. So if I can spend my days trying to help a 40 year old woman whonever held a book have a bit of a better chance to feed their family and not fear for their safety, I will do it.
We all have challenges. Life is hard for all of us. Instead of worrying about who is or is not holding my hand, all I can do is offer to hold yours.
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